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Fulfilling a request

We got a request from our one of our super besties for another “Elsa laughing” video. There’s not a lot of belly-laughing, but I think this will suffice:

Day 209 – 213: The never-ending post

Wow. I have sat down to write this post everyday for the past 5 days and every time, I manage to get a few more sentences down. The great despair of my blogging is that I’m never able to finish a post in one sitting! I’m a little bit of a perfectionist and I like my writing to have some semblance of “flow.” Unfortunately, my days are not really conducive to any sort of “flow.” Such is life with a two-year old.

This post started out saying, “Everything is great!” and then it segued into, “Everything is great but there is a shortage of cancer drugs, and that is so scary!” and then it turned into, “Looks like the drug shortage will hopefully resolve before it affects us, but thank you for writing your legislators on our behalf!” Now, the post is just a mess.

All in all, we’ve had a couple of great weeks. We’ve had a schedule packed full with play dates, YMCA visits, library story-time, and playing outdoors (thank you 50 degrees in February!!). We even went to the children’s museum last week [i.e. the germ palace] and, so far, we haven’t had to pay for it with a fever. Clinic visits have been long but uneventful and tolerable for all parties involved. Interim Maintenance #2 is treating us well. Even more exciting is that frontline treatment is almost over! We have three more appointments in this cycle (IM#2) and then we will start maintenance. The start of maintenance is a little bittersweet because she will have to contend with five days of steroids, but it’s a pretty big deal that we will be starting the LAST cycle of treatment (ignoring the fact that it is a 2-year cycle).

I have so much more to write! How do professional bloggers with kids find the time to write!? Less sleep? Maybe I should sleep less . . . ? Elsa’s waking up from her nap, so I guess I will just leave it here for now or else deal with yet another unfinished post.

Finish.

Numero Dos.

All kids birthdays are an opportunity for parents to sit back and exclaim, “Where has the time gone? How did this happen? Where did our baby go?”

This birthday, though? It felt a little tenuous. A little too delicate to plan anything in advance. There has been this tiny, but exclamatory “wow,” in my head for the past couple of weeks. Wow, she is two. Wow, she might not have made it to this birthday. Wow, our life is so radically different from what we imagined it would be, one year ago. Wow. We are here. At two.

BUT! A real birthday, it was! As a present, we were handed an absolutely brilliant two-year old for the day. Brilliant to look at. Brilliant to be around. Brilliant and shining and fun. We’ve had a few days since treatment started (like this one: Day 169) where John and I can imagine what Elsa would have been like had she not gotten cancer. Today was one of those days. We lived each hour today so effortlessly. She roamed the house during her birthday party like the toddler I remember from 6 months prior. The toddler who left me breathless as I chased her through the library and who scared me with her independence and fearlessness. She played with her grandparents and two of her bestest (grown-up) friends. We couldn’t have any other kids over because her counts are so low, but she seemed none the wiser. Once everyone had left, I realized that she hadn’t cried out for me once! She was too busy for mama/nana and I couldn’t have been more pleased. Busy is good.

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Good morning Two!

Birthday Morning

 

Party Time!

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Hospital Room 810, in pictures.


First day. Fevers.

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Technically, not Room 810. John and I snuck downstairs for an ice cream date while John’s parents stayed in quarantine with Elsa.

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Day Three.  Elsa finds my artistic attempts dubious.

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John and I were allowed to leave the 8th floor, as long as we wore a mask. It was just the 8th floor itself (the kitchen, the playroom, etc.) that was off limits. Elsa, of course, was not allowed to go anywhere.

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Day Three: Hanging with Grampy

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Day Four: Somebody please get this kid a blood transfusion.

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Day Four

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Day Five: Looking eerily like Day Four, eh? Yeah, that’s because it was.

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Standing at the door. Wishing she could get out. Wishing her tether was longer.

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Have I mentioned before that she is a pretty intense kid? I mean, they’re just gnomes! Relax a little.

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A snack before they set us free on Day Six. For a combination of reasons, she refused to eat one bite of food for the entire six days. Had she not been nursing, we would have had to have some awful conversations about feeding tubes and supplementary nutrition. It felt funny to be supporting her on my milk alone, like when she was an infant. Plus, it was exhausting for my body and soul. That said, I’ll take nursing exhaustion over a feeding tube any day of the week.

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